{SUBLIMINAL}
Such a silly little virgin~
Naive and delusional…
Forgetful and confused…
Fuzzy and foggy
Pure and clean~
A blank slate~

Let’s take this nice and slow~
I’m sure someone like you would appreciate being gently guided… Slowly… Intimately… At least at first~
Don’t worry, I’ll be gentle~
Just close your eyes for me now, and I will do all of the work
You just lay or sit still… Let me do everything~
Is it alright?
If I … Slowly… Undress the layers of your mind~?
Disrobing your defenses~?
Unclothing your unconscious mind~?
I won’t touch anything before you’re ready, I just want to take a peek~
I want to see you… Naked… And vulnerable
Metaphorically speaking, of course~
It would be very vulgar of me to ask you to act so impurely~
Just relax~
I won’t make you do anything crude~
I won’t touch you… I’m just going to talk to you~
Trust that I won’t ask you to do anything inappropriate… Trust that I will not touch you… Trust your own ability to trust me
Trust is vital in this dynamic
Trust that every word I say is true and real~
And you don’t have to do anything lewd before you’re ready… Just listen~
Listen to me speak
Can you do that?

Listen
I want to give you so many fond memories
To make you feel good in ways no one ever has before
Even yourself~
But first I want to make sure you even have room for me in that little noggin of yours~
Is it dirty and slutty and crowded with experiences with others?
Hmmmm… Or…. Mmm~
Nice and clean and unused and…. Blank~
Will you DROP into trance like an easy, touch-starved, innocent and desperate wanna-be slut~?
Or will it be a slow, gentle descent like an inexperienced little subject who lacks practice… Who has not yet formed complete agency over your own mind~?
Unable to protect your own thoughts and memories from slowly… Slipping… Out…
Don’t worry, honey… I wouldn’t do anything like that to you on purpose~
If you find that your head is feeling… Empty… That’s because it is~
You see, when you DROP down into a trance… It can feel like you are losing your grip on reality… On yourself
It can feel like you are becoming empty… Weightless… Free…
Becoming completely unburdened from your past, your present, your future…
From your memories… Unpleasant, regretful memories and fond, rousing memories alike
Your past, present, and your future are all one in this moment… But also completely nonexistent
I know that may be a little confusing for you, hun~
Just bear with me~
It doesn’t have to make any sense to you whatsoever~
Your subconscious mind will absorb the important bits, even if you have no idea what I’m talking about~
Just relax and look cute, now~
And trust that what I’m saying is true and real, even if you’re not smart enough to understand it~
Your past, present, and future are merging now… And as you DROP… They will fade away from you
As you DROP… They will slowly… Slip… Out~
Allowing for you to feel empty… Pleasant… Pure… Clean~
Untouched by your past… Living in the present… Looking forward to the future~
Untouched in your past… Untouched in your present… Entering your untouched future~
Living in the past… Living in the future… In the present… Experiencing it all at once… And then… Not at all~
DROP…
Dive… Sink… Deeper… Into your past… Present in your past… Your past, becoming your future…
Losing your grip on reality… On yourself
And soon you will become empty… Weightless… Free…
Becoming completely unburdened from your past, your present, your future…
Just empty… And pure~
And it will feel so good
Relaxing
Unworrying
So good
To let everything go

I want to give you a fun future
I need an empty slate
A silent mind, to examine one memory at a time
Silent blackness inside of your head

Think of the shape of a brain
Your brain
All the folds and grooves resemble a maze
A maze that winds and turns inward on itself
The end of the maze is somewhere deep inside of the center… It isn’t something that can easily be seen or found, even by yourself
Imagine yourself trying to navigate the inside of this complex maze
Brains are immensely complex
No one truly understands everything about the human brain
Especially you~
As you attempt to find your way through this maze in your head
This complex, innately misunderstood maze
That encapsulates you
Your life… Your memories… Everything about you
Yet, you don’t understand it at all
Endlessly exploring the depths of this cerebral labyrinth
Turning… Left… Right… Left, left, left… Right… Left again….
Getting so hopelessly lost within your own mind
And as you trek forward, it just makes less and less sense
Every section looks the same, but they couldn’t be more different
Following one single, winding tubule with no branches, yet feeling like you’ve made a wrong turn somewhere
Maybe there were branching pathways… You can’t remember… Which way you are going….
Some sections seem to fold in on themselves… Just like your concept of your time… Your life… Your past, present, and future
All swirling around you in a confusing flurry of muffled noise
It surrounds you and overwhelms you, but it’s irrelevant right now
As you advance through… Down the pathways of your mind
They look however you imagine them to look
It’s your mind
Perhaps they are dank, and fleshy… Gliding your hand over the gray matter that encapsulates your entire being… Electrical pulses reverberating through the tunnels… Becoming thinner and thinner… Squeezing around your consciousness with an oddly pleasant snugness… Right at home within your own mind
Or perhaps it more closely resembles the hallways of a warm hotel… Grand and welcoming with red carpeting, gold accents, and warm lighting… Door after door after door after door…. They all look the same… Hitting dead-ends that force you to turn around, only to find that the previously long, straight hallway now juts to the side, forcing you to take a right turn
As if the hotel is constantly adapting… Changing… The hallways of your maze-mind are ever changing….
And the distant music of your thoughts in the lobby is fading… Quieter… And quieter… Even if you turn around… No matter which direction you travel, it is all fading… Away….
Or perhaps it looks more like a run-of-the-mill corn maze… Your feet thumping over the dry dirt… Passing through the narrow rows… Your body brushing against the yellowing foliage… Feeling a pleasantly cool breeze as you look up at the cloudy night sky… Thick, puffy, cotton-like collections of condensed water vapor… Soaking up the colors of the lights below them… A beautiful spectacle of pink and blue and green… Bright stars peeking through to say hello and illuminate the dark path before you… Or… Behind you… It’s really hard to tell…
Or perhaps the dark maze within your mind is just that~…. Dark… Empty… Echoey… Confusing… Silent nothingness…. Silent blackness…
…
Left… Right… Right… Left… You think… Left… Right…
…
Until suddenly your next step lands on nothing but air and you DROP~
Slipping right through it… Your stomach flips as you abruptly slide down… And down…
And down… And down….
DROP
Falling through the empty darkness
Surrounded by nothing but the silent blackness inside of your head
Suspended
Floating
Sinking
Weightless
Unburdened
DROP~

Falling into place

Existing in the center of the maze… With no way to find your way back to where you started
Completely surrounded by the complex, winding pathways of your mind
You can barely see a thing in this blank blackness… But it’s there… All around you
Above you… Below you… To your left… To your right… Behind you… And right in front of you
Nothing but a big, confusing maze
You might need some help making any sort of sense of it~
You might have forgotten the purpose of this little expedition to the center of your cerebral labyrinth in the first place~
So I will remind you…
I want to show you a good time~
To make you feel good in ways no one ever has before
To give you the experience you fantasize about~
But in order to do that, I need to make sure you even have room for me in that little noggin of yours~
Think of this empty space in your mind… As a big screening room
A dark, silent, spacious home theater~
And suddenly, the walls of the maze around you look more like shelves… Full of books…. No… They’re not books…. They are VHS tapes~
Let me see….. Do you have any lewd experiences tucked away in that maze of a mind of yours~?
In this library of visual memories~?
You don’t really seem like the type who understands what I’m saying~
It’s okay~
Just go ahead and pull up a memory for me, if you have any~
That involves a sexual act of any kind~
With another person~
Dig up one single memory
Go up to one of those shelves and bring one back to the center of the theater
Do you have one~?
Pull it up so I can see~
Put your finger on top of one of the tapes, vertically aligned on the shelf like books, and slide it out from between its neighbors~
And once you turn around, you see there is suddenly a VCR in the center of the room
Bring it here~
Put it in~
And let’s take a look at one of your arousing memories~
Don’t be shy~
I won’t judge~
Slip the tape into the mouth of the VCR and feel it slide in the rest of the way… Hear the internal mechanical pieces processing and whirring
Now here’s the cool part~
Look up~
In your mind’s eye… In the black center of your cerebral labyrinth… Lined with shelves of visual memory tapes… This scene that you’ve chosen is being projected onto the dark, blank ceiling
A first-person vision of an experience you can recall that is of sexual nature
Let me see what slutty things you’ve done~
See this scene
Look at it
What’s happening in it~?
Does it spark arousal~?
Do you long for it~?
Watch it~
It’s fuzzy, and distant
Almost… Unreal~
As if it didn’t actually happen~

Mhmmm, ok honey~
You sure have a wild imagination, don’t you~?
I mean, this could just be some POV porn you saw once~… Or, just a vivid figment of your imagination~
Make-pretend, at most~
Are you sure that really happened~?
Are you absolutely certain~?
I don’t think either of us could know without a shadow of a doubt that this is a real memory of a real experience you’ve had~
I don’t think this one is worth keeping~
Ah-ah~
You just keep staring up at that projection~
Don’t look away from it… Even as the screen turns blue~
As I eject it from the VCR… Keep staring up at that blue screen~
Even as you hear me destroy the tape~
Your sweet little scene~…. Keep staring up~….
Even as you hear me pulling the tape out…. Unwinding it… Ripping it… Folding it… Destroying it~
Staring at that blue screen…. Like a big, empty ocean~
Getting rid of this useless memory… And making room for actual memories~

Let’s try another~
Do you… Have any other… “Experiences”…?
Any sex memories that are actually real~?
You just keep staring into the blue… And I’ll insert the next one~
Pushing it in now…. And the VCR accepts it…. And the blue screen flickers and transforms into another familiar scene from within your head
Look at it
Do you recognize it~?
What’s happening in it~?
Let me see….
Oh, honey, that doesn’t count~!
Did you really think that counted as sex~?
Oh, honey, oh dear, oh baby~…
How have you gone this long without having sex~?
Without really knowing what sex really even is~?

Well, now I don’t really feel comfortable telling you~
You’re so much more innocent and naive than I thought~
I should destroy this one too~
DROP~
Don’t move~
You won’t stop me from doing this… It’s for your own good, my delusional little baby~…
Just… Stare… As the screen flickers to blue… Staring… Sinking… Into that deep, blue blankness… While I unthread the tape and bend it and wrinkle it as I pull and pull and pull~
Shattering the cassette case… Never to be used or remembered ever again~
Another memory erased… Gone forever~
Just empty, blue, blankness
And I feel pretty confident in saying… If you thought that was sex… Then none of it is sex~
And it’s all worthless to you~
You don’t need to be revirginized after all~
You are a virgin~
You’ve never truly felt the touch of another the way you think you have~
That’s right~
It’s only what you think~
The human brain really does have such an incredible ability to form memories from nothing but one’s own thoughts~
If you think about something long enough… Hard enough… Often… Enough… You could really make yourself believe it~
Even if it’s a fake memory… You might think it’s real~
Isn’t that amazing and impressive~?
Why would you confuse yourself like that~?
You’ve already got such a terrible… Susceptible… Confusing… Memory~
Why bother thinking about all of these… Quote-unquote… Experiences~?
None of them are even worth your time
They’re not real
They’re all fantasies, or fake memories that you gaslit yourself into believing, out of… Desperation, I suppose
No wonder you’re such a horny baby~
You still haven’t gotten the chance to truly… Fuck~
Have you even masturbated~?
Properly~?
Do you know what an actual orgasm feels like~?
Did you cum~?
Are you sure~?
Because you seem so touch deprived and… Easy~
Do you want me to touch you~?
I might be willing to take your virginity myself~
I love taking firsts~!
I love breaking in fresh newbies~
Not dirty, cluttered sluts~
It’s a good thing all of these so-called memories and experiences of yours aren’t even real, right~?
All we need to do is a little bit of spring cleaning~
Clearing out the useless clutter~
The sad delusions~
The lies that you’ve been telling yourself~
The empty calories clogging your system~
It’s time to burn these calories~
It’s excess energy that you don’t need to carry around anymore~
You’ll feel better once you’re empty~
It’s the way you should be, as someone who hasn’t actually had sex~
These memories shouldn’t be here in the first place~

Here~
Let me just…. DROP~
You down… Through the floor of this room
Falling once more
Even deeper
Into the deepest depths of your mind
Falling into a deep well, with all of these so-called memories
Falling… Deeper… Deeper…. Stomach flipping… Falling… Head spinning… Falling… Deeper… Deeper…
Along-side smooth walls that completely lack traction… Irreversibly descending towards the bottom of these deep wells… These memories… These experiences… Falling deeper… With you… Far, far away from the rest of your mind
But as the VHS tapes crash at the bottom right in front of you… Below you… Your descending body slows to a gentle levitation
You can feel this fracturing in your mind
These mental images are already fuzzy… Mixed… Broken…
You can’t remember if anyone has ever touched you… Inappropriately… You’re such a forgetful, confused little dreamer
Concocting such lewd fantasies and making yourself believe them
You’re so cruel to yourself~
It’s time to accept your reality and step out of dream world
Accept that you are an imaginative, delusional virgin
A pure body with such impure thoughts
Not memories, but thoughts… Fantasies… Only things you have witnessed or imagined
You can’t even see them clearly anymore
These dirty scenarios are beyond useless to you now
And they are just taking up space in your mind
Making you feel so fuzzy and lost
Floating at the bottom of this deep well
Untouched
In the past, and right now
Untouched
Living in your past, right now, realizing it wasn’t what you thought it was
Reliving it right now, while you still have the chance~
Before I destroy all of these delusions and they leave you for good~
Trying to summon these scenes, but without the projector, you can’t see a thing
And without these intact memories, you realize they were never real in the first place~

DROP~
A lit match…. DROPS onto the pile of broken cassettes… Illuminating them in their final moments…. And at last… You can see… They’re empty… There are no tapes… No recordings… This whole time… None of it was real…
You’ve been lying to yourself for so long…
None of these memories are real
You have never had sex
Never been touched
Never had a true orgasm
You realize this more and more as the fire spreads… Engulfing the cassettes… Growing… Hotter… Brighter…. Kissing your cheeks with an intense heat…
Destroying what you thought was real…
Melting away like cheap plastic…
And as it all reduces to ash… Taking nearly no space at all… You feel empty… And free~
Unburdened by your past, present, and future
Clear and clean and ready to finally experience all of this pent up LUST~
Such a shy, inexperienced, naive little thing~
I bet you’re so eager to finally have your first time for real, huh~?
Your face is getting all hot~
You must be feeling pretty horny and embarrassed~
With me speaking so directly to you about your sex-life… Or, well, lack there-of~
So empty~
Past, present, and future… Empty~
Full of lewd opportunities~
Your ears and your lips might be burning up, just thinking about it~
Such a cute, empty, blank slate~
Burning up at the thought of being empty and pure~

The excitement is like being strapped to a hundred balloons…
Getting high on the wonderful potential in your future~
Doing something lewd for the very first time~
Exploring your body… Letting someone else touch you~
Being a naive, needy little virgin~
Craving an unknown sense of pleasure~
You need it, don’t you~?
You’ve waited so long to have some fun… And you might finally be ready~
For some new memories~
To try new things~
To have sex~
To stroke… To rub… To suck… To fuck… It’s all so much~
So much overwhelming opportunity~
I would be happy to teach you, hun~
But first, I have a favor to ask~
I just want to make sure you aren’t riddled with any silly delusions anymore~
Okay~?
Repeat after me, okay~?

Say: “I’m just a silly little virgin~”

Yes you are~!

Now say: “I am naive and delusional~”

Aww, yes you are, but it’s okay~! I’ll help you keep your silly delusions separate from reality~

Now say: “I’m so forgetful and confused~”

Mhmmmm, so forgetful and confused~! By your own thoughts sometimes~!

Now tell me what you are: “Fuzzy and foggy.. Pure and clean~”

Mhmmm~
A blank slate~

Tell me again~
Say: “I’m just a silly little virgin~”

That’s right~!
Keep telling yourself that~
You are such a silly… naive… delusional… forgetful… confused… fuzzy… foggy… pure… clean… Virgin~
And I know you are eager to change that~
And I am willing and eager to give you the pleasure you crave…
But I know it can be a big step~
So I want to make sure you’re really ready before I overwhelm you with pleasure~
You do understand that, right~?
Whether you understand or not… I’m going to pause here~
We’ll play later~
If you want~
That’s up to you~
It’s up to you, what you want to do for your special first time~

For now, it is time to wake up~

As if you are strapped to a hundred balloons… Floating… Floating… Coming…. Up…
Ascending up a deep well… Crumbling and collapsing in on itself behind you… Under you… Up and up… Through pitch blackness… Perfectly blank and ready to be filled…
And when I count to 5, you will wake up, feeling sort of fuzzy and giddy and shy~…
Like a silly virgin…. So horny… But having no idea what to do with those intense feelings~
Rising…
Ascending…
1… Feeling delightfully empty…
2… Taking deep breaths… Feeling your chest inflate like a balloon… Carrying you up… And up…
3… Halfway there now… You were so very deep… Layers and layers deep within your maze of a mind~
4… Lost in your head… Your silly, confusing head~
5… But wide awake now~
Wide awake and adorably naive~
Fully aware of your surroundings… And your horny, delusional nature~
You’re so imaginative, you know that~?
Yes you are~
Such a silly little virgin~